At first it was funny… and well, that tweet still may be. Then, it was the single ‘I Hit It First’ that clearly was about Kim Kardashian even though Ray J claimed it wasn’t, yet the pixelated photo kinda sort of proved otherwise. Now, Brandy’s bitter little brother is offering sex tape profits to Kim and Kanye West as a “wedding present”. His Twitter bio is a simple, I don’t hang with stars, I create them. No one knows the names, much less remembers the women on For the Love of Ray J so who are the other randoms-turned-celebs, I haven’t a clue.
Ray J girl, you’re holding on way too tight to the past and you’re doing thee most.
But everyone has a Ray J in their life, right? Starting from the ex who won’t let us go to the friend who dwells on the days in high school. They “joke” around about our weight way back when or like to bring up old news no matter how hurtful it may be to us. They’re the people who claim to be off that but their every move seems to focus on you and they prefer to live in a place you no longer reside at.
People love to hold things against you and will remind you of your errors like a repetitive Sallie Mae notification. One lesson I’ve learned as a woman is, no matter how close you are to people, it’s important to keep some things to yourself. I’ve long heard about using discretion when discussing your relationship with your girlfriends but I learned the hard way when an old friend of mine kept bringing up past events every chance she got. Our conversations would start off in the present and suddenly drift backwards, never forward and never focusing on what was next for my partner and I. I truly believed she thrived off my past, my pain gave her pleasure but the minute I felt just a drop of happiness, her unhappiness was magnified.
A lot of people don’t want to see you doing better than them. A lot of people will hold your past hostage when your only focus is your future. If you can’t applaud me, especially after I found happiness after leaving what felt like hell, you got to go. I can’t keep you around if all you choose to do is focus on what was and what I used to be. We can’t vibe with one another if you think nothing will ever be as good as your last and you choose to mope over the memories of what could have been. I’m not saying you can’t hurt over your breakup or feel a little shitty because your college days are over and you wish you could have that old thing back, but there’s a difference when you’re comfortable feeling complacent and living in the now isn’t an option. My mistakes molded me but they don’t define me.
And if you hold what I’ve done against me when I’ve let that part of my life go, please remember one thing:
What Sally says about Suzy says more about Sally than Suzy.